{"id":5998,"date":"2020-05-03T09:55:19","date_gmt":"2020-05-03T17:55:19","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/glenandpaula.com\/wordpress\/?p=5998"},"modified":"2020-05-03T12:31:58","modified_gmt":"2020-05-03T20:31:58","slug":"46-thoughts-on-my-46th-birthday","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/glenandpaula.com\/wordpress\/archives\/2020\/05\/03\/46-thoughts-on-my-46th-birthday","title":{"rendered":"46 thoughts on my 46th birthday"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Inspired by Kevin Kel\u00adly\u2019s 68 Bits of Unso\u00adlicit\u00aded Advice<\/a>, here are 46 thoughts which occur to me on my 46th<\/sup> birth\u00adday. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

These are not the most impor\u00adtant things I believe nor are they ranked. They\u2019re what came to mind, and I offer them in the hope you\u2019ll find at least one or two nuggets use\u00adful. Yes, I am aware that many of these are not orig\u00adi\u00adnal to me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

  1. Lead\u00aders should be exam\u00adples and not excep\u00adtions. Don\u2019t impose rules upon oth\u00aders you are not will\u00ading to fol\u00adlow your\u00adself.<\/li>
  2. When you\u2019re look\u00ading for men\u00adtors, look for peo\u00adple at least a decade old\u00ader than you who have suc\u00adceed\u00aded in at least two dif\u00adfer\u00adent envi\u00adron\u00adments. Some\u00adone who suc\u00adceed\u00aded once often has a hard time dis\u00adtin\u00adguish\u00ading what was luck ver\u00adsus what was wise. Some\u00adone who has suc\u00adceed\u00aded more than once is more like\u00adly to have learned prin\u00adci\u00adples.<\/li>
  3. Wis\u00addom is want\u00adi\u00adng the right things, know\u00ading how to get them, and pur\u00adsu\u00ading them whole\u00adheart\u00aded\u00adly.<\/li>
  4. There are two ways to gain wis\u00addom: from your own expe\u00adri\u00adence or from the expe\u00adri\u00adence of oth\u00aders. Do as much of the lat\u00adter as you can. Read wide\u00adly, talk to inter\u00adest\u00ading peo\u00adple, and in gen\u00ader\u00adal be a sponge for wis\u00addom.<\/li>
  5. Ask peo\u00adple who have what you want how they got it. For exam\u00adple, I see sin\u00adgle peo\u00adple talk\u00ading to each oth\u00ader all the time about how to tell if some\u00adone is right for them or not. That\u2019s fine, but also ask some\u00adone who is hap\u00adpi\u00adly mar\u00adried how they made their deci\u00adsion. I see new par\u00adents give one anoth\u00ader advice on child rear\u00ading philoso\u00adphies. I sup\u00adpose that\u2019s inevitable, but also ask the par\u00adents of admirable teenagers or grown chil\u00addren what they did.<\/li>
  6. Peo\u00adple on the left dis\u00adtrust big busi\u00adness. Peo\u00adple on the right dis\u00adtrust big gov\u00adern\u00adment. Maybe we should be sus\u00adpi\u00adcious of all big insti\u00adtu\u00adtions and make sure they have prop\u00ader checks and bal\u00adances. <\/li>
  7. Most peo\u00adple who dis\u00adagree with you polit\u00adi\u00adcal\u00adly are rea\u00adson\u00adable peo\u00adple who have had dif\u00adfer\u00adent expe\u00adri\u00adences than you.<\/li>
  8. No mat\u00adter what you believe (about reli\u00adgion, about pol\u00adi\u00adtics, about some issue with\u00adin your pro\u00adfes\u00adsion), there are peo\u00adple smarter and bet\u00adter-informed than you who dis\u00adagree with you. That doesn\u2019t mean you are wrong, but it does mean you should be hum\u00adble.<\/li>
  9. Amer\u00adi\u00adca real\u00adly is a remark\u00adable nation. Love it enough to keep improv\u00ading it.<\/li>
  10. The deli\u00adcious\u00adness of a cui\u00adsine is gen\u00ader\u00adal\u00adly pro\u00adpor\u00adtion\u00adal to the num\u00adber of peo\u00adple who eat that cui\u00adsine at home. This is why Chi\u00adnese food is bet\u00adter than British food.<\/li>
  11. The best hand\u00adful of books on a sub\u00adject can teach you most of what you need to know about it. You can often find great books on a sub\u00adject by googling \u201cSUBJECT syl\u00adlabus\u201d and skim\u00adming through four or five col\u00adlege syl\u00adlabi and not\u00ading recur\u00adring titles.<\/li>
  12. In col\u00adlege take pro\u00adfes\u00adsors not class\u00ades. Find the best pro\u00adfes\u00adsors and take what\u00adev\u00ader they are teach\u00ading.<\/li>
  13. You are not oblig\u00adat\u00aded to fin\u00adish a book sim\u00adply because you began it. Give a book 100 pages minus your age to grab your atten\u00adtion.<\/li>
  14. The con\u00adsen\u00adsus view of well-informed peo\u00adple is usu\u00adal\u00adly right, but when it is wrong it is huge\u00adly wrong.<\/li>
  15. The cost of main\u00adte\u00adnance is far less than the cost of repair. Change the oil, brush your teeth, stay in shape, etc.  When rel\u00ade\u00advant, put recur\u00adring main\u00adte\u00adnance tasks on your cal\u00aden\u00addar.<\/li>
  16. When a task is impor\u00adtant, get the tools you need to do it right. Don\u2019t just get by with some\u00adthing that sort of works.<\/li>
  17. Just get start\u00aded. Imple\u00adment and iter\u00adate. Begin\u00adning on a grade B plan now is (usu\u00adal\u00adly) bet\u00adter than wait\u00ading to devise a grade A plan you can start on next year. If you just begin with an okay plan and improve it as you go along you\u2019ll be doing some\u00adthing far supe\u00adri\u00ador a year from now than if you spent end\u00adless hours dream\u00ading about The Best Way. The big excep\u00adtion is things that are not eas\u00adi\u00adly reversible (like tear\u00ading down a wall in a house \u2013 spend as much time think\u00ading that one through as you need).<\/li>
  18. Mon\u00adey is a tool. Like all tools, there are a lot of prob\u00adlems it can\u2019t solve. But the prob\u00adlems it can solve it solves very effec\u00adtive\u00adly. Go read the Red\u00addit per\u00adson\u00adal finance wiki<\/a>. <\/li>
  19. Accept that writ\u00ading is revis\u00ading. It is okay if your first draft is hor\u00adri\u00adble. Just get your thoughts down onto paper and then you can work to make them bet\u00adter.<\/li>
  20. Life is the lab\u00ado\u00adra\u00adto\u00adry of phi\u00adlos\u00ado\u00adphy. Just as in sci\u00adence, lots of the\u00ado\u00adries sound good until they are put to the test. You will dis\u00adcov\u00ader that some things can be thought but not lived and you should reject them.<\/li>
  21. Be gen\u00ader\u00adous. Not only is it kind, it is pru\u00addent.<\/li>
  22. A Chris\u00adt\u00adian is some\u00adone who believes in the res\u00adur\u00adrec\u00adtion of Jesus from the grave and lives in light of its impli\u00adca\u00adtions. Real\u00adiz\u00ading Jesus has risen changes every\u00adthing.<\/li>
  23. Every\u00adone is amaz\u00ading, at least poten\u00adtial\u00adly. If you can\u2019t see the awe\u00adsome (or the poten\u00adtial) in some\u00adone you prob\u00ada\u00adbly don\u2019t know them well enough yet.<\/li>
  24. A fail\u00adure to appre\u00adci\u00adate beau\u00adty is a moral fail\u00ading. If you can\u2019t see the beau\u00adty in some\u00adthing that many oth\u00aders can, try to fig\u00adure out why. It may expose an area of poten\u00adtial growth.<\/li>
  25. Beliefs dri\u00adve behav\u00adior. If you want to change the way you act, first change the way you think.<\/li>
  26. All behav\u00adior makes sense. If some\u00adone does some\u00adthing you don\u2019t under\u00adstand it is because they were think\u00ading some\u00adthing you find incom\u00adpre\u00adhen\u00adsi\u00adble. To them it seemed like their best option. Fig\u00adur\u00ading out what they were think\u00ading doesn\u2019t nec\u00ades\u00adsar\u00adi\u00adly excuse their behav\u00adior, but it does make it sen\u00adsi\u00adble.<\/li>
  27. Root for your team to win, not for the oth\u00ader team to lose.<\/li>
  28. Chester\u00adton was right: no one should be allowed to remove a fence who can\u00adnot explain why it was put there in the first place.<\/li>
  29. In your pro\u00adfes\u00adsion there are a hand\u00adful of peo\u00adple you should stalk. You are look\u00ading for peo\u00adple who have the same basic strengths as you but who are oper\u00adat\u00ading at a high\u00ader lev\u00adel with them than you are. Read every\u00adthing they\u2019ve writ\u00adten, lis\u00adten to every speech they\u2019ve giv\u00aden, and talk to every\u00adone who knows them. If befriend\u00ading them is pos\u00adsi\u00adble, go for it.<\/li>
  30. Some\u00adday you will stand before the Judge, so don\u2019t play the fool with Him now. Fear God like you fear elec\u00adtric\u00adi\u00adty or fire \u2014 respect His pow\u00ader.<\/li>
  31. Try\u00ading to be cool is like apply\u00ading for an off-brand cred\u00adit card. Even if you attain it, you can\u2019t spend it any\u00adwhere it mat\u00adters.<\/li>
  32. For my fel\u00adlow min\u00adis\u00adters: the pur\u00adpose of a ser\u00admon is to help peo\u00adple believe, under\u00adstand, and obey God\u2019s Word. You prob\u00ada\u00adbly nat\u00adu\u00adral\u00adly empha\u00adsize one of these \u2013 be sure to delib\u00ader\u00adate\u00adly include the oth\u00ader two as well. Strive to preach so that your mes\u00adsage is per\u00adsua\u00adsive to a skep\u00adtic, com\u00adpre\u00adhen\u00adsi\u00adble to a new believ\u00ader, and applic\u00ada\u00adble to dai\u00adly life.<\/li>
  33. A few years ago I heard some\u00adone say you should argue like you are right and lis\u00adten like you are wrong. That\u2019s pret\u00adty good advice.<\/li>
  34. Bad news is like milk not wine; it does not improve with age. Open that bill, read that let\u00adter from the IRS, respond to that \u201cwe need to talk\u201d text. You can only find the way out once you know where you\u2019re start\u00ading from.<\/li>
  35. Are you sin\u00adgle? A first date is only an inter\u00adview for a sec\u00adond date, so if in doubt ask them out. Have you been asked out? If in doubt, say yes. The ques\u00adtion is not: \u201cDo I think I could mar\u00adry them?\u201d The ques\u00adtion is: \u201cDo I find them inter\u00adest\u00ading enough to want to spend a few hours with?\u201d The thresh\u00adold for going from date 1 to 2 is a lit\u00adtle high\u00ader, and from 2 to 3 is high\u00ader yet.<\/li>
  36. Foot\u00adnotes are bet\u00adter than end notes. Side notes rule them all.<\/li>
  37. There are a few books and authors you will see men\u00adtioned repeat\u00aded\u00adly by the authors you respect the most. Lev\u00adel up and begin read\u00ading the authors your authors are read\u00ading.<\/li>
  38. Los\u00ading weight is very hard for some peo\u00adple, but don\u2019t assume it is for you until you try it. Resolve that you will be okay with feel\u00ading hun\u00adgry and set a sim\u00adple rule that you fol\u00adlow ruth\u00adless\u00adly. For me, I decid\u00aded that I would not eat more than 600 calo\u00adries at any meal and that I would only eat three meals a day with no snacks. It worked real\u00adly well.<\/li>
  39. One of the keys to a good beard is shav\u00ading your neck. Avoid neck hair.<\/li>
  40. Inter\u00adna\u00adtion\u00adal stu\u00addents are amaz\u00ading peo\u00adple. They left every\u00adthing behind in pur\u00adsuit of knowl\u00adedge. Get to know them and be excel\u00adlent hosts to them.<\/li>
  41. For\u00adgive\u00adness is about eras\u00ading debts. If you for\u00adgive a loan, that means that you don\u2019t expect it to be repaid. Like\u00adwise, to for\u00adgive an offense is to give up your expec\u00adta\u00adtion it will be made right. When you have a hard time for\u00adgiv\u00ading some\u00adone, ask your\u00adself what it is that you believe you are owed. You might dis\u00adcov\u00ader you are still hold\u00ading on to expec\u00adta\u00adtions (of an apol\u00ado\u00adgy, of resti\u00adtu\u00adtion, of changed behav\u00adior, of vengeance, of rec\u00adon\u00adcil\u00adi\u00ada\u00adtion, etc). Put your expec\u00adta\u00adtions behind you and move on. If you find you can\u2019t, pray for God to help you. If you can\u2019t even do that then pray, \u201cLord, I am not yet will\u00ading to for\u00adgive them. But I am will\u00ading to be made will\u00ading. Help me.\u201d<\/li>
  42. For\u00adgive\u00adness is not the same as rec\u00adon\u00adcil\u00adi\u00ada\u00adtion. You can for\u00adgive some\u00adone with\u00adout trust\u00ading them again.<\/li>
  43. Not every\u00adone should mar\u00adry. Sin\u00adgle\u00adness is a noble lifestyle. How\u00adev\u00ader, most peo\u00adple will mar\u00adry and who you mar\u00adry will wind up being far more impor\u00adtant than what you do for a liv\u00ading. Do you know what you call a CEO with a fail\u00ading mar\u00adriage? Mis\u00ader\u00adable. If you spend a ton of ener\u00adgy and time prepar\u00ading for a high-impact career while assum\u00ading that a good mar\u00adriage will just hap\u00adpen you are being fool\u00adish.<\/li>
  44. Cal\u00aden\u00addars are bet\u00adter than to-do lists. When you get a task, put it on your cal\u00aden\u00addar. If there\u2019s no time on your cal\u00aden\u00addar you\u2019re just mak\u00ading a false promise by putting that task on your to-do list.<\/li>
  45. Avoid temp\u00adta\u00adtion. When temp\u00adta\u00adtion does come your way, flee. Resist\u00ading temp\u00adta\u00adtion is a fool\u2019s game. Just as flow\u00ading water wears down rock, so con\u00adstant temp\u00adta\u00adtion can wear down the strongest willpow\u00ader.<\/li>
  46. We are sup\u00adposed to wor\u00adship God, love peo\u00adple, and use things. But we often wor\u00adship things and use peo\u00adple or we idol\u00adize peo\u00adple and love things. Keep God first and every\u00adthing else will fall to its prop\u00ader place.<\/li><\/ol>\n\n\n\n

    <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    Some thoughts from an aging man offered in the hope that a few of them help you.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"wp_typography_post_enhancements_disabled":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"46 thoughts on my 46th birthday, inspired by @kevin2kelly","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5998","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-of-random-interest"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p6Ded-1yK","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/glenandpaula.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5998","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/glenandpaula.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/glenandpaula.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/glenandpaula.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/glenandpaula.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5998"}],"version-history":[{"count":16,"href":"https:\/\/glenandpaula.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5998\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6022,"href":"https:\/\/glenandpaula.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5998\/revisions\/6022"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/glenandpaula.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5998"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/glenandpaula.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5998"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/glenandpaula.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5998"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}